hello! thank you for reblogging the "what to do about gaza post!" xo, analligator
Asketh - Anonymous
you’re welcome, human person! we like constructive ideas, especially when so many people feel so helpless in the face of very bad things!
it is not a good day!
we have a sudden burst of heat, and one human person feeling very grim about being jewish today, and the other curled up in a fetal position over trying to find a doctor for her mom!
our roadie, Bob, is a thing called a Jewish, which we think is some kind of what you humans call a “race” or “ethnic group”, and what we fish look at, then look at each other, then look back at you, and then shrug, because frankly humans all look very much the same to us.
there’s not a lot of variety between you. we’ve mentioned this before. consider the smallest human person, an infant (what we call fry), next to the biggest human person, which we think might be a basketball player, or that Samoan dude who is always trying to catch us and eat us, or maybe that guy in iceland we ran into one time? size wise those are your main ranges, and then look at a full grown krill, and an infant blue whale. so you can see we are not impressed by your supposed “differences”.
oh, and then color! oh, you make so much about color! and yet you all range in shade from pasty white to dark dark brown, and all the beiges in between, and THAT. IS. IT!!! there are no blue humans, or pink humans, or striped humans, or polkadotted humans! some of you try to compensate with tattoos, which we like very much, but seriously, there is almost literally NO DIFFERENCE between you in terms of color!
so what’s left?
well, our roadie, Bob, tried to explain, because we think he looks like a “white” guy, you’re right, there’s no real difference. and what’s worse is both jews and arabs are semetic people, and believe ourselves descended from the same dude.
we said wait, what?
he said yeah. we’re all supposed to be descended from abraham.
we said WHOA!!! and stared at him, and wondered who this “abraham” human person is, and why can’t he stop his offspring from killing off so many of his other offspring, and then realized we were getting totally high from the paint fumes in the room, and looked around and saw piro was lying in the fetal position still, whimpering and painting on the wall. or, rather, what you human persons call “tagging”, with a can of spray paint.
not a good day. the smell of mold and paint, humans feeling rotten, fucking awful american “health care” system. our roadie, Bob, realizing he can’t actually speak to any of his family about any of this because apparently if a jewish person criticizes israel they are “self hating”, and our roadie, Bob, sighs at this and says “No, I just hate those other Jews.”
tomorrow it’s supposed to be cooler. we will see.
Governor Corett signed a bill allowing gas drilling in our parks. We need to vote him out of office in November!